Dear George,
The other day I went for hike through
the famed English countryside we are blessed with here in Great
Britain. I had dressed for rain, not something that sounds too daft
for the average UK hiker to do. However, the seemly endless summer of
rain we were experiencing had taken the day off. The result was that
i was now overdressed and was painfully aware that I wouldn't last
more than a few hundred yards before collapsing into a sweaty pile of
fabric. I really needed something else to wear. There were scant few
moments before my train departed, fortunately I caught sight on a
clothes shop inside Waterloo station. I burst inside and like a
whirling dervish I began swooshing hangers across metallic rails,
waving excitingly coloured garments in front of myself, and all in
all provided a riveting diversion for the four members of staff.
With enough time to grab a cup of tea, I dashed from the store
clutching a thin grey v-neck t-shirt and an olive green baseball cap.
I'm a man who doesn't care much for
hats; i'm ambivalent at best. However, I knew the sun would be
bearing down on my poor lilly white skin for the day and roast it to
a fine red finish. The baseball cap, I reasoned, would serve as
canvas barrier against the yellow might of the sun. Also, since I
would walking through forests, fields and forgotten footpaths I
figured, no one would be around to see me look silly in a hat. With
that in mind I boarded the train, tucked my water proofs, and other
now redundant layers into my back pack and awaited my journey to
begin, cap firmly nestled on my head.
Now, long story short, after an hour of
skipping my merry way across country I began to feel the sun beating
down on my neck. I'd applied lashings of sun block, but the Boots'
own brand solution was no match for Apollo's power. I would solve
this problem by simply spinning my cap 180*, thus using the cap's
peak as shield protecting me from further sola persecution. I wore
that cap backwards for the rest of the day. I didn't think it was
too bad, actually I didn't think about it much at all. It felt more
comfortable backwards, my face wasn't hidden, my neck wasn't burning,
my hair was hidden, and it provided a much needed sweat barrier! And
i'd kind of forgotten I was wearing it like that...that was until I
wore it to work, then I knew I was wearing it. I have rarely known an
item of clothing to cause such reaction. For those who are avid
readers of this blog will know I had recently spent a day with flies
undone and had less reaction. The looks and comments were those
comparable to those Mel Gibson would receive had he walked into a
synagogue. … it was relentless.
Now I save my cap wearing exploits for
when i'm hiking across country, jogging around the park or sitting
alone in my room, in front of the mirror pretending i'm in an early
90s boy band...
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